Two People Shaking Hands in Front of Two Other People

Jeremy Pollack, Ph.D. is a conflict resolution specialist and founder of Pollack Peacebuilding and Peaceful Leaders Academy. He is also Chairman of the Board of the Peaceful Leadership Institute, the President of the Florida chapter of the Association for Conflict Resolution, and Chair of the Workplace Peace Committee of Division 48 (Division of Peace Psychology) of the American Psychological Association. His credentials include being a Certified Organizational Development Coach (CODC™), a Certified Clinical Trauma Specialist-Individual (CCTS-I™), and an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) under the International Coaching Federation. Jeremy is an Adjunct Professor of Psychology at Arizona College, and still actively participates in coaching and training sessions offered by his companies. He lives in Miami with his wife, Jenny, and their labradoodle, Denver.

In a world of evolving workplaces and constant change, the ability to receive and process constructive feedback is a superpower. This skill separates those on a fast track to growth from those who may feel stuck. Whether you’re a seasoned manager or just starting out, constructive criticism is a constant companion on the professional development journey.

Many employees welcome constructive feedback, though the challenge often lies in embracing it and making it work for them. This blog post dives into transforming receiving feedback from a potential sting to a springboard for getting better at what you do.

Importance of Receiving Feedback for Personal and Professional Growth

While the idea of receiving feedback might seem daunting for some, it offers a unique pathway to unlocking one’s development in both personal and professional spheres.

Personal Growth

Receiving feedback is about evolving as a person. Constructive criticism highlights blind spots—parts of ourselves we might not normally see.

Let’s take communication as an example. Maybe you’re a dynamic speaker, but your written communication comes across as abrupt. Feedback can change that, promoting better teamwork and fostering stronger collaborative relationships.

Critical feedback can even push you outside your comfort zone. Perhaps a supervisor suggests you lead a presentation, which is something you might usually avoid. This nudge can unlock hidden potential and newfound confidence.

Photo of Employees Speaking with Supervisor

Professional Growth

Regarding career advancement, if you receive feedback, use it to improve your performance. If you’re unaware of areas needing development, you’ll plateau. Honest, constructive feedback illuminates what needs refining. It could be technical skills, project management approaches, or interpersonal communication.

Remember, the world of work changes constantly. Those open to more feedback on their performance become adaptable and invaluable.

Imagine you’re a sales representative. Consistently getting negative feedback about a lack of follow-through might sting initially. However, addressing that issue could significantly boost closed deals and overall success.

Top companies know that providing feedback—including development feedback—isn’t just for managers. It encourages accountability, and peer feedback can build trust in teams. Think about the kind of colleague you admire. Chances are they’re open to more feedback and eager to get better.

Types of Feedback and Their Impact

Not all feedback is created equal. Understanding the nuances between different types of feedback will help you process it more effectively and fuel your growth.

Positive Feedback

While positive feedback seems straightforward, there’s more to it than just a pat on the back. Specific positive feedback reinforces your strengths. Did you nail a difficult client presentation? Did your report exceed expectations?

When the person giving the feedback pinpoints what you did well, it builds confidence and tells you what to replicate. Positive feedback is the fuel that keeps you motivated.

Negative Feedback

This type of feedback often gets a bad rap, but it doesn’t have to be demoralizing. The key lies in separating truly harsh, unhelpful negativity from feedback that’s pointing out genuine areas for improvement.

It’s your initial reaction to feedback that matters. Feedback shouldn’t make you feel disrespected. Instead of being discouraged, use negative feedback as a diagnostic tool. Where do you need to focus your energy to get better?

Constructive Feedback

This is the holy grail of feedback. Constructive feedback provides clear insights about areas needing improvement and offers suggestions or guidance on doing things differently.

An effective feedback giver will offer constructive criticism to help you enhance your performance. It’s valuable to proactively seek this kind of feedback and not just wait for an annual performance review.

Common Barriers and Resistance to Receiving Feedback

Even if we intellectually understand the value of feedback, the following roadblocks can sabotage our ability to use it for growth.

The Shield of Defensiveness

It’s a natural human instinct to get defensive when we hear constructive criticism, particularly if it touches areas where we feel insecure. Phrases like “It’s not my fault” or “That’s not how I meant it” can block our ability to absorb the message. The key is recognizing defensiveness as a shield and consciously choosing to lower it.

Haunted by the Fear of Failure

If we have underlying self-doubt, even well-intentioned feedback can feel like confirmation of our inadequacy. This fear can lead us to reject constructive feedback or become overly focused on past mistakes instead of future improvement.

Drowning in Feedback

Too much feedback can be overwhelming, especially if delivered poorly or all at once. When bombarded with things to fix, it’s easy to shut down.

This is why effective feedback is focused and spaced out, allowing time for processing and action. Think quality over quantity, especially during a team meeting when discussing multiple points.

Questioning Relevance and Trust

If you don’t believe the feedback is accurate or don’t trust the source, you’re far less likely to act on it. Building rapport and a track record of helpful critique is crucial for those giving feedback. That said, if the received feedback regularly seems off-base, it’s worth seeking a second opinion.

Stuck in Our Comfort Zone

Sometimes, we resist feedback changes because they require effort and push us outside our comfortable ways of doing things. Embracing a continuous improvement mindset helps fight the inertia that keeps us stagnant. It’s okay to start with small steps to improve performance, then progressively take on more.

communication skills required for leading a small team

How to Create a Safe and Supportive Feedback Environment

Whether you’re a manager or a team member, a culture of open and honest feedback doesn’t happen magically. The following strategies can make feedback a positive, growth-focused experience for everyone involved.

Setting the Stage With Expectations

Clarity is key. Talk openly within your team or organization about the importance of feedback and why it’s valued. Discuss what constructive feedback looks like and set expectations for how it will be given and received.

Building a Foundation of Trust

People are far more receptive to feedback when they feel respected and valued. Focus on building relationships where individuals feel heard and understood. When this trust exists, it’s less likely that feedback will be met with defensiveness.

Specificity Is Your Friend

Vague feedback like “That report needs work” is frustrating and useless. Those giving feedback should focus on specific examples and actionable advice on how to get better. Similarly, when you receive feedback, ask questions for clarity if needed.

The Power of Open Dialogue

Feedback shouldn’t be a one-way street. Treat it as a two-way conversation. Encourage people to share their initial responses, thoughts, and ideas about implementing the feedback they’ve heard. This makes them active participants in their own development.

Celebrating Growth

Make it a best practice to acknowledge when people successfully implement feedback. This reinforces the value of the process. Even small improvements are worth recognizing, as it shows that effort matters and motivates everyone to continue improving their performance.

Showing your willingness to improve your skills as a person by giving and receiving feedback is important, too. A good employee can admit they may feel uncomfortable giving feedback to others, so offering them support and encouragement is important.

Remember, even with the best intentions, there might be times when you hear things you don’t agree with or find hurtful. It’s okay to take some time to process the advice before you respond. A healthy feedback culture allows for this!

Effective Strategies for Actively Listening and Receiving Feedback Without Defensiveness

Shifting from defensiveness to openness takes practice. Here are some powerful strategies to help you master the skill of receptive listening.

  1. Focus on Understanding, Not Defending: When receiving feedback, your first instinct might be to prove the giver wrong. Change that mindset! Focus on truly understanding their perspective, regardless of initial emotional reactions.
  2. Listen for Key Points and Ask for Clarification: Instead of fixating on tone or word choices, zero in on the key points of the feedback. Ask questions like, “Can you share a specific example to illustrate what you mean?”
  3. Acknowledge and Separate Your Emotions: Feedback can trigger feelings like embarrassment or anger. Feeling those emotions is okay, but don’t let them hijack your response. Acknowledge them to yourself (“I feel frustrated right now”) and then set them aside to focus on the content of the feedback.
  4. View Feedback as a Tool for Growth: Remind yourself that the goal of feedback is learning and improvement. Identify areas where you genuinely agree with the feedback or see opportunities to do things differently.

Even critical feedback can hold some value, even if the delivery needs work. It also helps to remember that providing feedback can be tricky, so have grace for your team members, supervisors, or direct reports as they seek to help you grow.

Utilizing Feedback to Identify Strengths and Areas for Improvement

The true magic of feedback lies in turning it into a blueprint for your development.

  • Separate Strengths from Weaknesses: As you listen actively, note positive feedback (reinforce those strengths) and constructive criticism (these are your growth areas).
  • Look for Patterns: Does similar feedback keep coming up from different sources? This highlights key areas to focus on or blind spots to address.
  • Reflect Honestly: A growth mindset means admitting where you need improvement. Don’t let ego get in the way of progress.
  • Engage in Discussion: Talk with your manager, mentor, or trusted colleagues during or outside team meetings to get additional perspectives and brainstorm improvement strategies.

Implementing Feedback for Continuous Learning and Development

The real test isn’t just listening to feedback—it’s what you do with it. To translate the message into positive change, be proactive, not reactive. Don’t wait for feedback to come to you. Seek it out frequently by asking specific questions geared toward your development goals.

Start small, and don’t try to overhaul everything at once. Based on the feedback, pick one or two key areas to focus on. Create an action plan by breaking down improvement goals into concrete, achievable steps.

What specific actions will you take to address the feedback? Seek accountability by sharing your plan with a mentor, teammate, or manager. This support system can help you stay on track and cheer your progress.

Finally, while truly listening is critical, remember that feedback is often subjective. Weigh the various opinions when you receive feedback and ultimately develop a path that feels authentic to you. You don’t have to implement every suggestion, but thoughtfully consider what resonates.

Embrace Feedback as Your Growth Superpower

Throughout this blog, we’ve explored the importance of feedback, the different types you might encounter, and how to overcome the barriers that prevent us from fully utilizing it. We tackled strategies for active listening, separating strengths from improvement areas and creating actionable plans based on the insights gained.

If you’re ready to dive deeper into mastering this essential skill, Peaceful Leaders Academy offers a comprehensive course on responding to feedback. This program helps you build a solid foundation for turning challenges into a catalyst for personal and professional growth.

Contact us today to learn more and join the PLA community of leaders committed to continuous improvement.

Jeremy Pollack, Ph.D. is a conflict resolution specialist and founder of Pollack Peacebuilding and Peaceful Leaders Academy. He is also Chairman of the Board of the Peaceful Leadership Institute, the President of the Florida chapter of the Association for Conflict Resolution, and Chair of the Workplace Peace Committee of Division 48 (Division of Peace Psychology) of the American Psychological Association. His credentials include being a Certified Organizational Development Coach (CODC™), a Certified Clinical Trauma Specialist-Individual (CCTS-I™), and an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) under the International Coaching Federation. Jeremy is an Adjunct Professor of Psychology at Arizona College, and still actively participates in coaching and training sessions offered by his companies. He lives in Miami with his wife, Jenny, and their labradoodle, Denver.